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Released by: Echo Bridge Home Entertainment
Released on: 5/18/2010
Director: Ace Hannah
Cast: Deborah Gibson, Lorenzo Lamas, Vic Chao
Year: 2009
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The Movie:
Written and directed by Jack Perez under the alias of Ace Hannah (a much cooler name), Mega Shark Vs. Giant Octopus is a movie about a really big shark who fights a really big octopus. That's about it. There's a set up involving some scientists zipping around in the Arctic Ocean in a submarine - Emma (Deborah 'Debbie' Gibson - yeah, the eighties pop tart who would later record with The Circle Jerks for some reason)being the one that matters to the story line. They're doing some sort of whale related research and wind up coming across a giant shark and a mega octopus frozen in the ice. Once thing leads to another and of course, they're thawed out at which point they basically go on a rampage.
Emma hooks up with an old college professor of hers to investigate a dead whale that's washed up on shore. She's the only one who notices a big damn shark tooth stuck in the corpse. Later she meets a guy who looks like a young George Takai named Dr. Seiji Shimada (Vic Chao) who helps them with their investigation. Emma falls for him and they make out while the giant shark jumps out of the ocean and eats a jetliner before jumping out of the water a second time and eating the Golden Gate Bridge. Not to be outdone, the mega octopus destroys an oil rig just off the coast (insert your own tasteless BP joke here). As the creatures wreak havoc in the oceans, the government figures it should do something. An agent named Baxter Allen (Lorenzo Lamas and his mighty ponytail) figures he should just nuke the bastards and get it over with but of course, Emma and her friends don't want that to happen. They're instead going to use pheromones to lure the beasties out to see where they're hopefully finish each other off for good.
Full of horrible, horrible acting and equally horrible CGI effects work, Mega Shark Vs. Giant Octopus is just as bad as it sounds. The packaging touts 'a spectacular battle for supremacy of the sea' but really it's a bunch of Playstation 2 era digital effects work that looks like a cut scene from a decade old video game. The film does have some pretty radtastic moments, the aforementioned plane and bridge eating scenes being the obvious highlights, but in between those are long stretches of stilted dialogue, a bad romantic subplot, and cliché after cliché after cliché. That's half the point - the filmmakers knew damn well what they were making here and don't really appear to be attempting to make high art, but my God, what a bad film.
The cast aren't really given much to do here, and they all seem wholly aware that they come second to the titular creatures - fair enough, everyone has to eat and there isn't necessarily any shame in earning a paycheck. Everyone's got to eat, right? But they're really not even trying here, but really, when you know you're really only there to support goofy cartoon monsters, it's probably hard to find the right sort of motivation. Ultimately the does deliver a significant of goofy CGI monster versus monster mayhem, and if that's all you need, them by all means, jump right in but there's nothing here remotely resembling a good film.
Video/Audio/Extras:
Mega Shark Vs Giant Octopus debuts on Blu-ray in an AVC encoded 1.78.1 1080p high definition anamorphic widescreen transfer that looks about as good as you could realistically expect it to. The movie was shot on HD video, so there isn't any grain or print damage to note. Detail is just so-so, looking better than standard definition could really offer but never really impressing all that much. The outdoor shots that show off the natural scenery of the California locations look nice but the darker scenes and underwater scenes, of which there are quite a few, are a bit on the murky side. It's all perfectly watchable, at times bordering on good, but don't expect miracles here. Given the source material, the image is probably about as good as it's going to get.
The only audio option on this disc is a standard definition Dolby Digital 2.0 Stereo track in English. No alternate audio options are offered, nor are there any subtitles or closed captions. The quality of the mix is about average for a low budget film. Dialogue is fine, you won't have a problem understanding the performers and the track is well balanced and properly mixed. That said, this is a Blu-ray release, how cool would it have been to hear the 'shark eats the Golden Gate Bridge' scene in 7.1 DTS-HD? I guess we'll never know.
Extras? There aren't any. There's a menu and chapter selection, but that's it.
The Fina Word:
Let's call a spade a spade here. This is a movie where a gigantic CGI shark jumps out of the ocean and eats the fuck out of a jet plane. This is a movie with Debbie Gibson and Lorenzo Lamas. This is a movie called Giant Shark Vs. Mega Octopus. The Blu-ray looks okay and sounds merely average and contains not a single bonus feature, but it does deliver just what the title promises - a giant shark fighting a mega octopus. Take that as you will.