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Released by: Independent Entertainment
Released on: 9/27/2011
Director: John Niflheim
Cast: Tyrone L. Roosevelt, Jackie Stevens, Mia Copia, Lavender Rayne
Year: 2011
Purchase At Amazon
The Movie:
A photographer who specializes in fetishes brings sex-starved models to his fox pad, takes photos of them for his biggest client, Esoteric Magazine, and pisses away his money on drugs. He gets lucky with every model that he works with, but he's at heart a piece of shit and once he gets what he wants out of them it's time to hit the road, bitch.
His overbearing (and inappropriate) mother begs him to stop working in such filth and encourages him to come back to the roost and stay with her. She can take care of him. Instead the dude continues to scam models and piss off his dealer. Time to run home to mother? Yeah, plus a little more than that.
This is softcore, and not very good softcore. Of course the entire point of a movie like this is to show naked people having fake sex, and this one certainly fulfills that requirement. The sad part is it doesn't produce anything to make it memorable or even noteworthy. The majority of the movie is made up of long, drawn out photo shoots followed by simulated sex that quite simply isn't erotic. There's some nice looking women here (Mia Copia for example), no doubt about it, but it's just boring. Acting wise, it's so-so. No one shines, and some actors just don't look comfortable reciting their lines. Most of the dialogue seems forced. And the movie looks very amateur in the way it was shot and paced. Almost the entire film takes place inside a mostly barren loft and doesn't offer much to look at. There is a little walking-to-the-subway action somewhere in the middle, showcasing a street with some porno shops (nice clean porno shops) but other than that, not much going on.
The box copy says “…a shocking and seductive take on classic exploitation cinemaâ€. To make a claim like that takes some big balls and you'd better be able to put your money where your mouth is. Unfortunately, The Sex Merchants doesn't hold a shitty little birthday candle to the movies it compares itself to. It's not enjoyable in the least. And the “shock†ending is pretty stupid. Thankfully this one has a mercifully short running time, but even then 65 minutes seems like 2 hours. Just bad. Not interesting, not sexy, and not fun.
Video/Audio/Extras:
The movie is presented on DVD with an aspect ratio of 16:9 anamorphic widescreen. Its look is ok: the colors are decent, skin tones look good. The darker scenes look muddy, but seem void of areas of pixelation. Not reference quality by any stretch, but more than serviceable. The audio is a 2.0 Dolby Digital track, and seems free of any defects. Balance seems fine, although the volume seems a bit quieter than the average. The only extras to behold are a few trailers, Dairy of a Sex Offender, Defiled, and Faces of Schlock.
The Final Word:
Dumb. Waste your money if you must.
