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I Heart Monster Movies

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    Todd Jordan
    Smut is good.

  • I Heart Monster Movies



    Released by: IMDFilms
    Released on: 11/20/2012
    Director: Tyler Benjamin
    Cast: Doug Bradley, Tom Savini, Bill Mosley, Sid Haig, Linnea Quigley
    Year: 2012
    Purchase from Amazon

    The Movie:
    If you've ever longed to spend 75 minutes listening to people talk about why they love horror movies then this program is for you. Quick little interviews with horror movie celebrities and convention regulars pepper the film throughout, along with some business owners and artist and of course some die hard fans adding their two cents. And thrown into the mix are people who do not like horror movies but tap into the money portion of the industry for a living. Heck, there's even an expert talking about the negative impact horror movies may have. Its all here, just not really all too captivating.

    Faces familiar to genre fans pop up here and there sharing some stories, although most of which are pretty common knowledge to said fans. Dee Wallace, Doug Bradley, Sid Haig, Bill Mosley, Tom Savini, and Linnea Quigley are among those who make some time at a convention or two to throw some comments out there, but its mostly superficial. Aside from the celebrity clips, the filmmakers talk to tattoo and photo artists, a rabid female fan of Pinhead's, the owner of a bar devoted to all things Lovecraft, and a car club for hearse owners. Also brushed upon are musicians who make horror their theme, such as Voltaire and Toxic Zombie.

    But the whole thing is lacking in anything real substantial and plays out more like a Travel Channel feature, complete with unfitting polka music to play along with moments without dialogue. Polka music? At least that what it sounds like. At any rate, its nowhere near a documentary, and more of a “check out all this cool stuff in Portland” (Oregon) than anything else. That's not to say it lacks any merit, as there are some interesting things to look at (the hearses are certainly a conversation piece), there's just no meat to the production. For this viewer, one should walk away from a documentary feeling like they learned something. Instead this documentary seemed like watching a brainless television show at Halloween time.

    Still, as mentioned it has some merit. Although they talk to the bar owner way too long, it's a cool looking bar and is probably a site to behold in person. Aside from the cool hearses, there's a good helping of scantily clad models (and not the skinny kind, but women with nice figures) posing in sexy monster getups to ogle at. But again, that's just the thing with the doc. Things to look at, nothing to learn. Maybe if you come to the table knowing this information in advance, then the show will be less disappointing. Press play and go about doing something else, and watch this in the background.

    Video/Audio/Extras:
    The video quality is mixed, but mostly looks like an average disc. The sections with Bill Mosley's input are vastly inferior looking to the rest of the production, full of artifacts and looking like it was recorded on a less than stellar camera. But the rest seems fine. The 16:9 anamorphic image delivers decent color, average black levels, and some good detail. Audio is fine, a 2-channel Dolby track that is easy to understand, and the balance seems proper.

    Extras-wise, there's a trailer for the film, and a 3½-minute making-of featurette (boobs anyone?). A singing appearance by David J. of Love and Rockets and Bauhaus takes up about five minutes, and the band Toxic Zombie has a music video to behold. Lastly, a just-under two-minute featurette called “Favorite Horror Films” has people that showed up in the program mention what theirs are.

    The Final Word:
    Mildly entertaining, and certainly a labor of love for the producers, I Heart Monster Movies is less of a documentary and more of a travelogue for the city of Portland. Aside from that aspect, there's not a whole lot to take away from this one.











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