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Released by: Universal Studios
Released on: January 21st, 2014.
Director: Robert Rodriguez
Cast: Danny Trejo, Michelle Rodriguez, Jessica Alba, Tom Savini, Charlie Sheen, Mel Gibson
Year: 2013
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The Movie:
Everything old is new again! Robert Rodriguez's Machete, which was spun off of a great fake trailer that played during the theatrical run of his collaboration with Quentin Tarantino, Grindhouse, a few years back (though technically he first appeared in the Spy Kids movies), was a lot of fun. It gave Danny Trejo the rare chance to headline a Hollywood picture and it played off of old exploitation movie stereotypes in fun ways. Sure, like a lot of his work, it recycled ideas from movies we've all seen before, but it did so well and for those seeking pure, unfiltered goofball thrills, it definitely fit the bill. The movie promised a sequel, and a couple of years later, Rodriguez and Trejo delivered just that. Sadly, lightning doesn't always strike twice.
After an opening scene in which we find out what happens to Sartana (Jessica Alba), former Federale Machete (Danny Trejo) gets snagged by a racist redneck cop named Sheriff Doakes (William Sadler) and his cronies. It seems they don't like his kind and they're going to hang him, but before they can kill the world's toughest Mexican, a phone call comes in. Who is on the other line? Why, the President Of The United States of course (played by Charlie Sheen, credited here under his real name, Carlos Estevez). It seems that the government has a problem and that they only man that they can turn to is Machete. Doakes frees him, and he sets out on his mission.
See, there's a big time arms dealer out there named Vox (Mel Gibson) and he's got a missile that he intends to use to do very bad things to America. Machete has to take him down and stop him from hitting the launch button before it's too late. To do this, Machete heads south and crosses the border to his homeland where he runs into an assassin named El Camaleon (played by Lady Gaga and then by Walton Goggins and then by Cuba Gooding Jr. and finally by a scene stealing Antonio Banderas) and abducts a connection named Mendez (Demian Bichier) who suffers from multiple personality disorder. Helping him out along the way is a horny but deceitful Miss San Antonio (Amber Heard) and of course, his old pal Luz (Michelle Rodriguez). Before it's all over and done with, he'll settle his score with Osiris (Tom Savini), get some sweet loving, drive a tank through a wall and kill a lot of people. What he won't do is text.
If you dug the first movie, there's enough to like about this sequel that you'll want to check it out, but go in with appropriately tempered expectations, because a lot of this will seem very familiar. Novelty casting? Check. Bad catch phrases? Yep, lots of those. Enjoyable amusing riffing on various stereotypes? Yeah, we get a lot of that too. We also get some bad CGI, some ridiculous stunts, a fair amount of stylish ultra violence and even some gratuitous Star Wars references. Wait… Star Wars? Yep, it happens a few times and when it does, it completely shatters the illusion that any of this really matters. Of course, it doesn't, this is a popcorn movie meant to entertain and nothing more but by freezing a certain character into Carbonite and having Gibson zip around in a Land Speeder is not only unnecessary but also completely distracting.
The movie is too long at an hour and forty-eight minutes. Some more judicious editing on the part of Rodriguez certainly could have improved the pacing because there are more than a few slow spots in a movie that tried to market itself as a 'non-stop thrill ride.' This is, to be blunt, a drawn out retread.
But it isn't a complete disaster. Yes, the novelty casting is just that, a novelty, but sometimes it works quite well. Sheen is funny as the POTUs (even if the obligatory 'winning' joke is too obvious to be all that funny) and Gibson does well as the film's main heavy. The character of El Camaleon helps to keep you guessing, even if you don't have to guess that hard, and Banderas is a lot of fun when he shows up. Amusing work from Savini and particularly Bichier help to up the entertainment value of the picture. Amber Heard doesn't really stretch here but she looks good and if Michelle Rodriguez is doing the same thing she did in the first movie, well, so is Trejo so on that level it fits. This isn't essential, nor is it even remotely original given that it really uses a lot of the same jokes and quirks that pushed the first movie along, but it's a fairly painless time waster. Take that as you will.
Video/Audio/Extras:
Machete Kills looks great in 1.85.1 widescreen thanks to this excellent AVC encoded 1080p high definition transfer. The opening sequence has that 'Grindhouse' look to it in that it's got the fake scratches and print damage going on, but thankfully the film loses that once the colorful opening credits sequence ends and the movie proper starts. Once we get there, the image is impressively clean, clear and colorful with a slightly hot look to it suiting the mood that Rodriguez is obviously going for. Close up shots show off every nook and cranny of Trejo's stony face is easy to make out while texture in the costumes and backgrounds is remarkably revelatory. Black levels are strong throughout and there are no problems with the authoring to complain about. All in all, the film looks fantastic.
Also impressive is the English language DTS-HD 5.1 Master Audio mix, though an optional Dolby Digital 2.0 mix is supplied, also in English. The lossless track is pretty active demonstrating some fun surround usage and providing plenty of good directional effects in the rears throughout the movie. There aren't any problems with hiss or distortion to note and the levels are consistently well balanced while the sound effects have some good push behind them. Bass response is as beefy as you'd want without overpowering the performers and all in all this is a fun mix. Optional subtitles are provided in English SDH, French and Spanish.
The main extra on the disc is a twenty minute long featurette entitled Making Machete Kills. Made up of a collection of behind the scenes footage shot on set during production and interviews shot in a studio setting, here we get some input from Robert Rodriguez, Danny Trejo, 'Carlos Estevez', Mel Gibson, Michelle Rodriguez, Sofia Vergara, Demian Bicher, Jessica Alba, Amber Heard, Alexa Vega, William Sadler, Walton Goggins, Antonio Banderas, Lady Gaga and Cuba Gooding Jr. Topics discussed include what it was like bringing the character back, the action scenes, the use of foxy females in the movie, the character of El Camaleon, and the possibility of a third Machete film.
There's also a selection of deleted scenes included, six in total: Sheriff Doakes Talks About His Pappy, No One's On The Road Tonight, I Dreamt Nurses?, Meet Baby Machete, Tito's Been Tasered, El Camaleon Sounds Like Antonio Banderas This Time. These are moderately amusing but Rodriguez was right to cut them as they'd have just made a movie that's already too long even longer (though the Baby Machete clip is weird enough to matter). Combined, these scenes run just over twenty minutes in length.
The disc also include menus and chapter stops as well as previews for a host of other Universal titles but no trailer for the feature itself. A DVD version and a digital copy are also included and the Blu-ray case fits inside a slipcase cover featuring identical cover art.
The Final Word:
Machete Kills definitely has its moments but it's an inferior sequel that goes on too long and that feels very, very forced. The movie gets full credit for trying to build off of what came before it and by broadening its horizons in terms of scope, but there's just too much going on here for it to work as well as it could have. Regardless, it's amusing enough and a fine way to kill a couple of hours in front of the TV on a rainy afternoon. The Blu-ray looks and sounds great and the making of featurette is pretty fun. Trejo fans will probably consider it essential but unless you're a die hard, you'll probably want to rent it before throwing down your hard earned cash.
Click on the images below for full sized Blu-ray screen caps!
