• Vampirella: Feary Tales #3



    Published by: Dynamite Entertainment
    Released on: Dec. 17, 2014
    Writer: various
    Artist: various
    Cover artist: Jay Anacleto
    Purchase at Amazon

    Go HERE for last issue's write-up.

    Vampi’s mystery host throws her into some more storybook situations, this time with some stripper action to up the fun factor.But before that, and after another awesome Jay Anacleto cover (damn he paints her so well), Vampirella finds herself thrust into the story of “Vampirella and the Three Bears”, written by Elaine Lee and illustrated by Elmo Eklabuz.

    When her car gets stuck in a ditch, she walks to the Beary bros Gas and Sundries to seek out some assistance. Inside, Donnie Ronnie and Lonnie are all too eager to oblige the sexy red dress wearing lady but need to get back into the building before the moon comes up. These dudes are werebears and soda (or pop, or tonic, or whatever your neighborhood calls it) is the only thing that keeps them from succumbing to the moon. It has lithium in it, so they drink it by the gallon. As one can imagine, something goes awry, Vamp needs to take care of the situation, but she gets a piece of info about a blonde woman that came by that way that looked just like Vampirella. Before she can get more out of them, she’s swept off to the next story.

    Joe and Keith Lansdale wrote this next one called “Red Riding Hood”, with Eman Casallos handling the art chores, and doing so to great effect. Vampi finds a strip joint in Louisiana named “Grandma’s House”, run by a bulldyke-like old grandma who is impressed with Vampi’s audition. As luck would have it, strippers have been disappearing and found bloody and half-eaten, and so the blood-sucker from another world feels compelled to figure out what’s going on. Is the killer the old lady? The fat pervert that won’t leave the girls alone? One of the strippers? The werebears? Maybe all of them.

    In a series that’s really grown on this reader, Feary Tales is silly and at times kind of corny, but it stays on the path of being adult-oriented. It doesn’t take itself seriously and neither should the reader. Nancy Collins provides the pages that tie the story together, which normally equals Vampirella taking and giving shit to the voice throwing her around the book. Hopefully her contributions will expand for the final issue, because she’s so awesome at writing the character, but we have her monthly series if not. At any rate, both stories are a hoot this time around, but so far the story by the Lansdales is the most entertaining up to this point. Some good humor, plenty of sex and violence, and a well-named roadside motel. Plus Vampi in pasties. Come on…how can you not dig that?