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Dismal

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  •  
    Todd Jordan
    Smut is good.

  • Dismal



    Released by: Cinema Epoch
    Released on: 12/21/2010
    Director: Gary King
    Cast: Lydia Chandler, Tim Morris, Jack Harrison, Bill Oberst Jr.
    Year: 2009

    The Movie:

    Pretty little brunette Dana (Lydia Chandler) is going to fail her college biology class because she's too squeamish to perform the critter dissections in the lab classes. Teaching assistant Curt (Tim Morris) sees an opportunity here, and not to just help Dana with her grade; he wants to help out ol' Curt out in the love department. He tells her of a weekend camping trip he has organized, into a swamp within driving distance, Great Dismal Swamp to be precise, and the trip is designed to help students who need extra credit. Against the wishes of her jealous boyfriend, Dana goes on the trip along with four other students: a smart kid who doesn't need the extra credit, but wants to get into the pants of a ditzy blonde that is on the trip, and an arrogant jock-type who brings along a skank who is not even in the class.

    Before long Curt and the kids arrive at their destination, where they happen along a dead alligator, one that has been shot by poachers (the first few minutes of the movie shows us there is someone in the swamps who dispatches a couple of 'gator shooting rednecks). The local game reserve guy (Bill Oberst Jr.) is called upon, and assures them there's nothing to worry about, but to be on the lookout. Exit game reserve guy. On to a little character development (Curt tells Dana that maybe some day she'll meet his daddy) which involves the asshole and his skank bumping uglies in the woods, of course sealing their fates since in these movies the people who screw always die.

    After a bit the kills start happening and the students get picked off one by one, including the teacher man, until the game reserve guy shows back up and then things take a turn for worse. The students that are left probably wished at that point they'd just kept running from the giant man (Jack Harrison) who was chasing them, rather than bump into the fish cop. From that point on we get to the real horror that is in store for them.

    This movie certainly isn't anything original. It's a tired formula, done much better elsewhere, and it's predictable pretty much from the get go. There are pieces of a number of films in here and if you're somewhat familiar with the genre you can spot them pretty easily. The Texas Chainsaw Massacre (the original and its sequel), The Hills Have Eyes, and any of the Friday the 13th movies; pretty much any movie you can think of with a deformed and mentally slow lummox, a dad who likes killing with his sons, and cannibal families. But even so, the film was made with competence and with a small budget, so there's impressiveness insofar as what the filmmakers produced compared to what they had for resources. And even though the movie is easy to predict, there's certainly entertainment value to be had. Just don't expect to be impressed with anything new or innovative. Yes, there are a couple of interesting kills (giant hook under the chin, bear trap massacre) but most of the carnage is done with CGI and it doesn't look good. One in particular is a chick getting sliced in half that looks simply dreadful. Crap like that really kills a movie. They could have done without the cartoon kills, but it wouldn't have helped the movie any. It's a by-the-book slasher flick that really doesn't get moving until past the 30-minute mark and the contents up until that point are quite uninteresting. Once it gets moving it at least keeps the energy up even if it is pretty unoriginal. And the end is something we've all seen before. This is by no means a throwaway film, but it certainly isn't anything noteworthy. Watch it if you dig slasher, cannnibal families, or hicksploitation, but you can pass it up if your looking for that diamond in the direct-to-video rough. It isn't this one.

    Video.Audio/Extras:

    Show here in 1.77:1 Widescreen, Dismal comes across as an average DVD by way of picture. The image overall looks pretty clean, the darker scenes struggle a bit with clarity. But the colors look nice, plenty of lush greenery and the blood runs red, and for the most part the black levels look ok. Skin tones look right, and there doesn't seem to be anything of note concerning imperfections like skipping, or pixelation. Again it's average for a DVD.

    The audio is a 2-channel Dolby Digital track and it sounds clean and free of issues. The balance seems correct between the talking and the stalking. There's nothing to say against the sound on this disc. It serves its purpose and does a fine job of it.

    The extras are pretty lame. Just a trailer for the movie, a “Still Gallery” of at three minutes and fourteen seconds, and an “also available” item that shows other Cinema Epoch DVD covers. The still gallery shows some publicity type photos and not just screen caps, so at least it has that going for it. But the extras are still lame.

    The Final Word:

    While nothing new, Dismal is at least mildly entertaining and not a total piece of crap. Some interesting kills, some nudity, copious amounts of blood, and a heaping helping of some red neckery help keep this one from the burn pile. The lack of extras, however, helps prevent this disc from being anything more than a one-time watch.
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