• Unquenchable Thirst for Beau Nerjoose, The

    Released by: Infectious
    Released on: April, 2017.
    Director: Johnny Buell
    Cast: Jeffrey Janoff, John Branch, Whim Grace, Jared Yanez, Linnea Quigley
    Year: 2016
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    The Movie:

    The Unquenchable Thirst for Beau Nerjoose is the sordid and stupid story of a man named Ron (Jeffrey Janoff). When we’re introduced to him, he’s having a pretty rough go of it. His wife Tracey (Britney Hancock) has just left him, he’s out of toilet paper having given his last bit to a homeless man and now he’s lost control of his bowels and made a mess of himself. If that weren’t bad enough – and it is bad enough – this has all happened to him on a very special day: the twentieth anniversary of his dear old mom losing her mind and being locked away in an insane asylum. That’s not all of it though, see, Ron has just learned that his mother (Teresa Boyd) has gone into a coma and that the doctor in charge of her care intends to put her to sleep for good. See, the doctor is also her lawyer and he’s doing this in accordance to her last will and testament.

    Looking for meaning in all of this, Ron decides to shove a magic mushroom up his asshole and, once he starts tripping, things get even weirder. Not only does he get jerked off by his aunt (Linnea Quigley) but he learns that he plays a part in an ancient prophecy where he and three nuns (Jared Yanez, Steven Fusco, Duggy Collomy) must defeat and evil overlord named Beau Nerjoose (John Branch) to save a sexy nun named Hope (Whim Grace) who may or may not be Ron’s sister and/or niece. Along the way he’ll get help from a Booty Worm (Dylan Hillerman), discover the dildo of light, and, well, titty maggots.

    What? Oh, and it’s a musical too.

    Juvenile to an amazing extreme, The Unquenchable Thirst for Beau Nerjoose is gleefully stupid and willfully crass. Dick and fart jokes, wanton nudity, sex toys, naked nuns, scatological humor, drug references and songs that are terrible yet somehow infectious – it’s all here and then some. It never aims for anything higher than the lowest common denominator but if you’re willing and able to laugh at this type of stuff, you’ll have a good time with this one. It helps to be in the right frame of mind (though sticking magic mushrooms up your ass might be going a little far) for this, but the film’s unstoppable unpredictability keeps you intrigued even as the humor starts to get a bit repetitious at times.

    The movie is also pretty ambitious in its own way. There’s some impressive Claymation work here as well as more traditional animated bits alongside the expected digital effects and the performances are as crazed as they are clearly committed.


    The Unquenchable Thirst for Beau Nerjoose arrives on Blu-ray in a nice looking AVC encoded 1080p high definition transfer framed at 2.35.1 widescreen. As this was shot digitally there’s obviously no print damage to note. Color reproduction is really nice and black levels stay solid and deep. Detail is strong for the most part, though depending on the lighting and camera movement some shots can and will look a little softer than others. Still, for a low budget movie, it translates to Blu-ray very nicely.

    Audio options are provided on the Blu-ray in English Dolby Digital 2.0 Stereo and 5.1 Surround Sound options, there are no alternate languages or subtitles provided. Both tracks sound just fine, but the 5.1 mix gets the edge for some of the placement and handling of some of the directional effects, making for a more involved listening experience.

    Extras start off with a featurette called Behind The Boners (The Making of Beau Nerjoose) that runs twenty-one minute. Alongside some amusing and interesting cast and crew interviews this piece also contains some interesting behind the scenes footage and some rather cool glimpses at how some of the more memorable special effects set pieces were put together for the feature. There’s also a three minute instructional video here called Turdin' It Up With The Fart Knocker Boner Squad (possibly the greatest title for a Blu-ray or DVD supplement ever) in which we learn the in’s and out’s of making poop for the movies.

    The disc also includes seven minutes of amusing deleted scenes worth checking out along with a seven minute blooper reel, two minutes of fairly crazed audition footage, a minute long film school pitch project called Build Your Own Goddamn Jib!, a trailer for Pool Of Blood Trailer, menus and chapter selection.

    The Final Word:

    You’ve never seen a movie like The Unquenchable Thirst for Beau Nerjoose, because there is no other movie out there like The Unquenchable Thirst for Beau Nerjoose. It’s crass, it’s stupid, it’s frequently hilarious and it’s genuinely creative. The Blu-ray release presents the feature in fine form and includes a decent array of extra features. Those with more refined tastes need not apply, but if you still think farts and boners are funny (and let’s face it, they are), this’ll probably crack you up.

    Click on the images below for full sized Blu-ray screen caps!

    Comments 1 Comment
    1. Maureen Champ's Avatar
      Maureen Champ -
      Three holo-jewish nuns from outer space?