Arrangement, The

[Ian Jane]

Released by: VCX
Released on: 2010
Director: Gerard Kikoine
Cast: Marilyn Jess, Jane Baker, Laura Clair, Alban Ceray, Jean-Pierre Armand
Year: 1981

The Movie:

This French made film boasts the talents of the always beautiful Marilyn Jess as a model who is dislikes her father slumming around with his maid (he's also schtupping his secretary, played by the just as amazingly beautiful Jane Baker). Marriage seems likely, and she wants to prevent it. She enlists the help of her friend Colette ( Laura Clair) to help her thwart any plans of matrimony. And of course screwing a photographer and some body builders will help things along, as well as a party that makes no sense. Pop this one in, sit back with whatever makes you happy, and have some fun.

We are treated to lots of sex with good old-fashioned pubes, natural women (and gorgeous French ones at that), and normal looking guys. The sex is pretty erotic with a number of atypical items thrown in the mix. Look for masturbation by vacuum cleaner (as well as a suck job), a blowjob through a hole in a photograph, an apple dildo, some magnifying glass action, some underwater scrotumizing, and an awesome drum solo during the obligatory orgy scene. There's also a little bit of incest in there, but don't let that get you, as it was accidental. Or was it?

The movie is full of awesome cheesy jazz music, stupid rapid-fire zoom-ins and zoom-outs…but the real fun with this one is the dubbed dialogue. It's just plain funny. Some examples:

• "Somewhat bizarre breasts I'd say.”
• “I guess you want my prick, huh?”
• “AH OHH! Don't bite. No.”
• “If a guy get worked up liked that all day by two cats, then he needs that for relaxation. (Referring to oral sex of course)
• “Mmm these apples are delicious! Apples are good for you.”
• “You're unbelievable you HOT CHICKS YOU!!”
• “This is like tasting wine. One is fully ripe, the other one sparkly and fruity. How is one to decide?” (asks a man when looking at two vaginas through a magnifying glass)
• Or how about this steamy talk during the dirty deed? Her: “Paul I'm cumming” Him: “I'm glad.”

This movie is awesome.

Video/Audio/Extras:

Well, it looks like the transfer is nothing more than a VHS transfer taken from a tape in nice shape. The flick was shot on film for sure. The ratio is 4:3, there's lot of dirt on the screen, and the colors are washed out. The dark scenes are real difficult to see. But who cares? It's great French porn

The audio is a 2.0 channel Dolby Digital track, although the same sounds come out of both speakers. At about the hour mark the audio goes haywire. The audio from beginning of the movie, the credits and a little before, plays three or four times in a row. Very weird. It makes the audio a bit chaotic for maybe 10 or 12 minutes. Then it goes away.

The disc has the standard extras format of the latest VCX releases. First up is a Photo Gallery (screen caps from the flick) which is lame. Next, a collection of “Bonus Scenes” from the movies “Pleasure Palace”, “Pussycat Ranch”, “Untamed Passions”, and “Cotton Candy”. Third up, trailers for “Extreme Facials”, “Private Moments”, “Second Coming of Eva”, and “Swedish Sorority Girls”. Then there's a trailer for Jim Holliday's “Only the Best. And last is an item VCX has been putting on all their discs, “Legendary Tribute” which can be skipped entirely. It's not anything great. Typical extras for the latest releases from this label, but fun enough nonetheless.


The Final Word:

Great stuff from the early 1980s, great porn from the French, weird sex aids, and dubbing that is so absurd it makes this more of an unintentional comedy. What more can a crappy movie lover want? Another one just like it, that's what.

[Ian Jane]

“I guess you want my prick, huh?”

I think this is a good line to use in real life.

[Todd Jordan]

have you had the chance to try that one out yet? I'm waiting for the opportunity at work to yell "you're unbelievable you HOTS CHICKS YOU!"