• Black Rituals Of Satanic Sex Cults (Alpha Blue Archives) DVD Review



    Released by: Alpha Blue Archives
    Released on: 2004
    Director: N/A
    Cast: N/A
    Year: N/A
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    Black Rituals Of Satanic Sex Cults - Movie Review:

    The devil has always loved, porno, hasn't he? I'd say that it's probably a pretty safe bet that he has, and would even hazard to guess that ol' Scratch has probably got a pretty decent sized smut library of his own down there in h-e-double hockey sticks. This compilation of vintage loops from Alpha Blue Archives rescues some of those Satanic-themed loops from obscurity.

    CULT OF SADISTS:

    Shot without sound, this one features some metal over top to add atmosphere. A man with great sideburns takes two hot chicks to some guy's house where they're bound, tortured, and fucked by cloaked cultists - the whole thing being filmed by a film camera slightly over to the side of the rack. Lots of nasty whipping, some fairly heavy BDSM, and one of the girls has her ass beaten so heavily it turns as red as a tomato.

    ORGY OF PAIN:

    A film by Sibly White, with effects by B. Mills - or so say the credits. I'm sure they're pseudonyms for someone somewhere. Again, no sound, so this time so silly Goth music plays over top of the film, which follows a pattern similar to the first short. A girl is slapped on the ass with a crop, by a group of cloaked and masked men while she's bound to some sort of hobby horse thing. Another girl shows up and dominates a man bound at his wrists and hanging from the ceiling. He's whipped until he bleeds and his nipples are pierced (or at least we're supposed to believe they are - I couldn't tell if this was staged or not). Soon the first girl is suspended upside down and everyone whips her, and her nipples are pierced as well. Her chest is sliced up a bit by a ceremonial dagger, then the camera cuts to the outside of the house where a man knocks at the door - then it cuts and the film ends - I'm not sure if it's presented here in its complete form or not.

    WITCH SABBATH HEXENSABBAT:

    Again, no live sound, just goofy evil sounding music. A gang of Satanists are hanging out in someone's dimly lit basement as gangs of Satanists are prone to do. After they drink a chalice of blood, a hot chick appears and her clothes are removed. The all-male group of devil worshippers takes turns on her, placing a cross around her neck. Soon a female member of the cult busts out a strap-on, and each of the girls takes a wad in the face. After that sex is done, they drink from the chalice again, and I'd assume the hot chick is inducted into their ranks of evil.

    MUMMIFIED SACRIFICE:

    Guys with stockings on their faces bind a woman Betty Page style, while metal plays loud over top (another one without sound). The two men leave her alone, bound, and then a different guy shows up and wraps her in white tape. A second guy shows up again, and they lift her into a coffin. The end.

    SATANIST:

    A funky bongo soundtrack plays over top of this one, where a nice looking blonde woman shows up to party with an evil Sonny Bono look alike (presumably the titular Satanist). He uses a yellow dildo on her, then has sex with her from a few different angles. He sodomizes her, shoots on her face, the end.

    LUCIFER'S LUST (AKA FUCK FOR PEACE):

    The devil appears in a woman's bedroom while her man is in the shower, in the form of a scruffy guy with a scruffy beard. He introduces himself as Lucifer, and the woman stripes. Then her man, who has fucking great sideburns, gets out of the shower. She gives him head, and away they go while the devil watches and cackles like an evil super villain from an episode of Batman. The end.

    SUBURBAN SATANIST:

    The film begins with continuous chants of 'hail Satan' and then an evil priest appears and gives a bit of a sermon, asking Satan to show up. Soon, a goofy red mask appears behind his poorly made up face, and he and a bunch of other devil worshippers pile onto a hot chick who lies on an altar, groping and dry humping her. An orgy ensues, all the while 'hail Satan' is chanted in the background. Everyone comes more or less at the same time, and then the film is as finished as they are.

    RITES OF URANUS:

    In the best film on the disc, a woman is placed on an altar while the cultists around her all chant 'Uranus.' Soon, they stick a lit candle up her ass and jerk off in front of her while she gobbles the occasional knob. Once the candle is removed, she humps the high priest, all in the name of the mighty Uranus.

    BRIDE'S INITIATION:

    A pair of young ladies reads up on witchcraft and then masturbates together on a bed. Then a dude in a cloak appears and he bangs them both in the ass. After that, one of the women is taken off in a wedding gown where she has sex with a guy in a cheap Dracula costume and some KISS make up while other cult members look on.

    Black Rituals Of Satanic Sex Cults - DVD Review:

    The video quality on this compilation is all over the place, depending on the quality of the source material used. Some of the shorts look pretty good and are nice and sharp with solid colors and a pretty high level of detail, while others don't fare so well and are sourced from tapes that look like they've seen better days. Given the scarcity of some of this material, it's pretty understandable and even somewhat forgivable, but I'd caution anyone from going in hoping for these shorts to look like the latest Vivid or Digital Playground release - but then again, it's not that type of porn though, is it?

    The audio is just as varied as the video. Some of the films weren't shot with sound and those ones are presented here with some gothy-metal overtop that kind of suits the territory we're venturing into. The ones that do have sound are a little on the flat side, but again, you can't expect too much going into this presentation in terms of fidelity. All in all, it gets the job done reasonably well - it just isn't perfect.

    There are some pretty interesting little extra features on this, which surprised me considering how obscure a lot of this material is. You kind of expect to see extra features on releases like The Opening Of Misty Beethoven or other adult films of that kind of stature, but on a selection of rough and tumble 'Satanic' porno shorts? Imagine that.

    Aside from the very cool opening menu screen, Alpha Blue Archives has supplied a fantastic gallery of 'Satanic Porn Magazine' pictures and cover art. Magazines such as Witchcraft Today and their ilk are showcased in this generous helping of the devil's own while the act out on their most base desires, complete with cheesy props and very budget looking capes and cowls to add to the sinister effects! As far as dirty still galleries go, this one is tops and there's a lot of pictures contained in here that are totally worth going through for those who dig on 70s sleaze.

    Alpha Blue has also supplied trailers for The Devil Inside Her (this one is in pretty rough shape but does a great job of marketing itself as a serious look at the occult and stars Terri Hall, Dean Tate, Zebedy Holmes, Nancy Dare, Rod Dumond, Annie Sprinkles and Jodi Maxwell and featuring a triple insertion scene!), Angel Above Devil Below (an Exorcist rip off featuring a talking vagina that becomes possessed by the devil), and Dark Dreams ('one of the most erotic films you'll ever see' in which young people are preyed upon by black magic!) as well as their Big Tit Superstars (a minutes worth of fantastic funbags!) and Sadistic Seventies (this also plays before you can get to the menu, and features some great clips from some prime sleaze-ball films - this disc is part of that very same series) series of compilation DVDs.

    Rounding out the extra features is an 'info' button that gives you the low down on who Alpha Blue Archives are (should you have stumbled upon this DVD by accident or something) as well as their contact information.

    There's also a chapter selection option that allows you to check out whichever one of the shorts in the compilation you want at the press of a button!

    Black Rituals Of Satanic Sex Cults - The Final Word:

    Black Rituals Of Satanic Sex Cults is a fantastic collection of perverted short films sure to tickle the fancy of any smut aficionado. Sure, the audio and video quality isn't perfect but these are old underground loops, they never did look that good in the first place. This compilation is pretty hard to take as a seriously 'evil' set of films, but it sure does contain some truly odd films and offers plenty of chills, thrills and sexy, hairy thrills for the more adventurous viewers out there in sleaze land.